Why The Men In The Flowing Gowns Should Be Held Accountable

Are members of the international oil cartel - OPEC - friends or foes? In a troubled world of terrorism and banking chaos, it's often difficult to gauge just who our influential friends really are. And if precious few of these high profile movers and shakers are Muslims, can it be any wonder? Firstly, they blow up the World Trade Centre - covertly aided and abetted, it's widely believed, by members of the Saudi royal family, rigidly conforming to a byzantine agenda of its own. And now, amidst the greatest financial turmoil the world has known, they threaten - oh, yes the men in the flowing gowns are ALWAYS threatening - to cap oil supplies in order to inflate the price at the pumps and in the engine rooms of industry. It's despicable. But is there anything the free world can do about it? Yes. We have to out-drill OPEC. Vast off-shore oil reserves in American waters must be exploited post haste. Similarly, untapped supplies in Antarctica must be be liberated. Auto designers in Detroit and elsewhere must be given billions and a cure-for-cancer remit to ensure the battery operated car that can run for a day and a night is parked in our driveways before the year 2020. And lastly, we ought to put a loaded pistol to the heads of an ungrateful, disorganised Iraqi Government (sic) and demand they share all their oil reserves with us at a discount price. I would say it's a fair exchange for the blood spilled by American and British forces (along with their allies) in a futile war which should be ended at midnight tonight.